I get a chuckle each time I picture the scene from â??My Cousin Vinnyâ? where Mona Lisa Vito, played by Marisa Tomei, dressed in her skintight flowered body suit, stomps her high-heeled feet and declares, â??My biological clock is ticking!â?
No kidding. I can relate, except for the flowered body suit. I get the same feeling every time I look in the mirror.
Have you noticed that when you get to be a certain age, itâ??s like youâ??re eating breakfast every 15 minutes? I canâ??t remember who said that, but while it didnâ??t register when I first heard it, it sure does register now.
As Ferris Bueller wisely quipped, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
We could sit around all day and remember movies weâ??ve watched, but the time has come to stop watching and play your part. At every age and stage of life, there is something you were created to do, that no one else can do.
You are unique, with years of wisdom and experience behind you. You have your own special way of communicating, a personality that is just yours, and a way of looking at life that is unlike anyone else’s.
If you have settled into the sidelines of life, if you believe that you are â??too oldâ? to engage in activities that you used to enjoy, then itâ??s high time you got off the sidelines and started sharing your gifts and skills and talents with others.
Do you have regrets about the way your life has turned out? Did your youthful dreams get waylaid? Did you set aside important plans, telling yourself that you would get around to them â??some dayâ??
Do you feel frustrated or depressed by the things you havenâ??t accomplished?
You still have a chance to pursue your dreams. Not only do you have a chance, but you also have a responsibility — even an obligation — to yourself and to the people you love to live your life fully, and to express yourself completely. Once you are gone, all that is uniquely you dies with you.
In graduate school, I learned about the phase of life that Erik Erikson described as â??generativity:â? A struggle against stagnation that ascends during adulthood.
Generativity in the psychosocial sense refers to the concern for establishing and guiding the next generation and is said to stem from a sense of optimism about humanity.
We are smack in the middle of this stage of life. Itâ??s time to give to the world all weâ??ve got.
I hear many people talk about retiring like it is some far-off magic time when they will finally be free or happy, or have time to travel or read, fully expecting that when they reach retirement age, there will be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow enabling them to live life on their own terms.
But while we are waiting for that magic day to arrive when we can finally live the life we want to live, our time is dwindling away.
Our important relationships are floundering, and the people we love are getting on with their lives because we are too busy or too depressed or too stuck in our rut.
My guess is that is not what you want. People make time for what they really want. If you have ever known someone who was newly in love, you know that to be true.
So itâ??s time to fall in love with this life of yours today, each and every day.
What do you really want from your life? What do you want to do? What do you have to offer?
Reach for what you want today. Take a step toward achieving that goal or that dream. Donâ??t wait for tomorrow to bring it to you; tomorrow may never arrive.
When you are young, you donâ??t realize how quickly opportunities pass you by, never to return. Now that your hair is turning gray and gravity is beginning to take its toll on your body, the passing of time cannot be ignored.
That book youâ??ve always said you were going to write — where is it? Sit down and start to write.
That trip to Thailand you wanted to make — go online and look at your options.
We attract the same energy that we put out there. If we are negative and complaining all the time, we get negativity back. Who wants to be with someone who is negative?
If you think you might fall in that category, it is not too late to take the bull by the horns and choose to be cheerful and positive.
Think of the things for which you are grateful. What about your life do you appreciate?
Recently, I was so gripped by the beauty of the full moon, it took my breath away. Are you noticing those things? Are you awed by the deer gathered in the meadow or the bluejays darting from tree to tree? Do you just stand in wonder and watch the geese play in the pond or bask in the warmth of the sun?
This is your time. Now. If you have been putting off living for a later time, a time that may or may not arrive, I encourage you to take the steps today to mold the life you want with your own words, your own hands your own actions.
This is your day. No one else can give it to you. No one else can take it from you. No one else can make it exactly what you want. Grab hold of it and live it. Your biological clock is ticking.
Clyde is a licensed marriage and family therapist practicing in Warrenton. She loves helping people break through those obstacles that keep them from loving the abundant life they were created to live. Call (540) 347-3797.